Let Bygones Be Bygones: How to Say Sorry Gracefully

Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.
~ Paul Boese
Life is never a bed of roses and one has to face hard times in life. There are times when you argue with your partner and end up in a quarrel; or you disagree with a friend or have a dispute. In either cases, you end up feeling low and wish to make up as soon as possible. The only way is to say the golden word, Sorry! Owning up to your mistake is very important, and it takes real courage to admit your mistake and apologize for your behavior.

Tips to Say Sorry Gracefully
▣ The first thing you should remember is not to fake your feelings or apologize for the sake of it.
▣ You should apologize to the person only if you genuinely feel sorry. Secondly, you should not lie or give false excuses; keep your apology brief and direct.
▣ When saying sorry, just say it and end the topic, then and there. Do not start the blame game as to who was the cause of the fight as it will lead to further arguments.
▣ When expressing your apology to someone, always look at the person in the eyes, stay calm and say it. Even if the person takes a longer time to respond, do not let your temper rise as you cannot expect a person to accept your apology immediately. Same is to be followed if the person pretends to ignore you.
▣ Now, how will you say sorry to your boyfriend or girlfriend? Once you have accepted your fault, remember never say sorry to your guy / girl over the phone or by texting. It is better if you meet him her in person and express your apology.
▣ There are different ways to apologize. You can say sorry with flowers, or a card with suitable apology quotes. On the other hand giving a small gift is also a sweet gesture and will really be appreciated. You can even take your partner for a lunch or so.
▣ Another tip, if you wish to apologize after a fight, the first thing you need to do is to bury your pride. Once you realize your mistake, give some time to your partner to cool off a bit and then apologize (do not expect the person to accept it soon). However, remember that saying sorry melts the anger of the person and hence, it will be easier for you to mend things.
▣ It is famously said that couples should not go to bed sulking. It is always better to sort out things quickly and bury the issue. Remember, it does no good to answer back or argue when tempers are flying.
▣ Lastly, if the person is ignoring you, you should try to figure out the reason for the same and apologize for it. If the person continues to ignore you, then the reason may be something else which cannot be solved by your apology. So, in that case, it is wise to let go and move on.

Apology Phrases
Here are some common phrases that you can use when you want to say sorry to someone.
▣ I am Sorry
▣ I apologize for_______
▣ Please forgive me for______
▣ I owe you an apology
▣ Pardon me for_____
▣ Please excuse me for_______

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We Tell You How to Be a Caring Boyfriend Without Being Clingy

22-10Are You a Clingy Boyfriend?
The answer is pretty much YES if you –
☞ Call her several times in a day without any reason.
☞ Get upset when she doesn’t respond immediately.
☞ Constantly fear that she would leave you.
☞ Can’t function without her being in touch.
☞ Are dependent on her way too much!
If you agree with all of these statements, then you are likely to snap back at us and say that all these are the signs of being in love. You want to be with the person all the time, talk to her, depend on her for the big and small things, and obviously, be around her because you care for her. She is your girlfriend at the end of the day, that’s what being in a relationship is, right? No, wrong! We may sound very practical as opposed to the ideal mushy tone that comes around when in love, but the truth is that there is a huge difference between caring and “being around all the time.” In fact, at times, the best way to show that you care is to respect your partner’s individuality and privacy needs.

You ask ten people of their definition of a healthy relationship, and all would agree that it should be minus a clingy partner. In the absence of being with someone who respects their individual space and the quintessential need for “me time”, the relationship is bound to become a smothering one and end sooner than ever. If you have been accused of being a clingy partner, then it is indispensable to pay attention to your behavior and rectify it before your excessive neediness turns into a repulsion in your girlfriend’s eyes. Yes you care, but don’t push it too far!
Before we begin to impart tips on being absolutely different from what you are right now, know that we totally understand your position in this relationship. There is always a reason people tend to get clingy to those they value the most. It could be a bad experience in the past, an unknown fear of being left alone, lack of trust in the other person, possible insecurities within oneself, or having been neglected during childhood. So yes, there are serious underlying triggers that have made you the way you are, but to change with the need of the relationship is the key to a long-lasting bond with your girl. The following tips will help you with the ways to be less clingy and more caring.
1: Respect Her Need for Some Space
Your ability to give out space is what will remove the clingy tag from your demeanor, and yes, we know it wouldn’t be a piece of cake for you! First off, you need to identify what makes you so cling-ish with her. Is it because you don’t trust her, you have nothing else to do other than being with her, or you just don’t see the reason to be apart? Whatever it is, nullify all your thoughts that make you sport clingy-ness.

The blatant truth is that the more clingy you are, the more likely she will leave you and eventually find someone who isn’t like you. Yes, there may have been a time when she said “you are the best”, but it was till you showed your needy self to her. Even the best things of life get too much to handle if supplied in excess. Spare her from getting your overdose.
2: Focus On Your Interests
Love seems to overtake our existence, and everything else takes a backseat. That is what creates a problem. You get engrossed in her s-o-o-o-o much that it becomes difficult for you to focus on anything else. While there are some girls that kinda like that, not all girls are the same. In fact, these days, irrespective of the gender, nobody wants a partner who is there ALL the time.

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Attention Men! You Simply Can't Miss This Relationship Advice

Women often complain that men change completely after a few years in a relationship, while men often wonder how the beautiful and intelligent girl they met a few years ago has turned into this whining, forever-complaining woman. Maybe neither of the partners is to be blamed, and it is just that after a few years in a relationship, the novelty begins to wear off, and partners develop a hostility that Republicans and Democrats reserve for each other. Every relationship goes through certain stages, and it is the responsibility of both the partners to ensure that they take concrete steps to mend their relationship before it reaches a stage of no return.

To ensure that your relationship is rock solid, there are a few investments and sacrifices that both the partners need to make, but as this article focuses itself on men, we will spare women from the sermon. Mentioned below are a few tips which may be of some help to men who are in a relationship, or aspire to be in one. Those who have come out of a nasty one to start all over again, can also take a look.
Transparency International
The importance of transparency in a relationship can’t be undermined. There are times when you can be going through a tough time in your professional life which can make you feel low and sad, but if you don’t communicate it to your partner, she can assume that you are not interested in spending time with her.

Sharing what you are going through can go a long way in ensuring that you and your partner are on the same page. Many men put off the idea of sharing their difficulties with their partner because they think that she can’t really help them much in dealing with the situation. We advise you to never underestimate women as they can provide you with unconditional love and support. They can prepare you mentally to deal with the situation. Transparency also means talking to your partner about misunderstandings that usually happen in a relationship. Talking about these problems helps both of you to deal with the situation in a prudent way.
Anger Management
What course of action do you take when you are stuck in an argument which has completely deviated from its origin? Do you retaliate, or choose to become the bigger person by following the policy of non-retaliation. An argument usually spirals out of control when there are a few suppressed feelings that are looking for a way out.
As we mentioned previously, if you don’t talk consistently to your partner about the things, or habits you feel she can do without, you create a reservoir of anger that is ready to explode. And, when it comes to something which starts as a squabble, these pent-up emotions act as the catalyst for a full-blown war. The point we are trying to drive here is that you should shed away the emotional baggage that all of us tend to carry when we are not able to communicate effectively with our partner, or for that matter, someone who are close to. Another exercise at damage-control is to give the other person a free run by choosing not to retaliate. We understand that it is difficult to achieve as backing off may signify that you didn’t have an explanation for the accusation, but you also got to remember that you can talk about all of this with a sober mind when the heat has cooled down. To cut the long story short, one of the best things that can work for you is to take a timeout and give each other some breathing space. By timeout, we don’t advise you to have a drink and arrive five minutes later to fight with an increased vigor! Ideally, a couple of hours or more will be good enough for some good sense to prevail on both of you. And trust us, when you sit down to talk about what went wrong and how to amend it, the realization will dawn upon both of you that the issue at hand is minuscule and can be sorted out way too easily.
Do the New
To maintain the freshness in a relationship, it is vital that you do new things frequently. If we continue to do the same thing over and over again, monotony creeps in, making our relationship dull and boring. The way out of this situation is to create something new, something unique so that it surprises your partner and brings a smile on her face. Talk to her about the days when you tried so hard to impress her.
Remember what you were wearing on your first date and try to recreate the moment by wearing something similar. Take a day off (if you can afford one!) and take her on a drive to the countryside. Come home early and cook something that she likes immensely. The options can be myriad, and you are the best man to judge what she will like the most. These little gestures go a long way in cementing the bond of love between you both, keeping that dreaded monotony away from the relationship.
Priority Level: 1
One of the most important challenges men face is how to prioritize relationships. There are times when you are not able to deliver on your promises because of professional reasons. Also, it can also be the case that you headed to the bar with your ‘pals’, forgetting that you had planned to buy groceries with your wife.
While it is important that you give importance to your office as well as your friends, the pertinent thing to remember here is that the commitments you make to your better half that should be on top of your priorities. You need to remember that your partner is someone who is going to stay with you for the rest of your life. If you like to meet your friends once in a while, ensure that you are not doing it at the cost of the quality time you could have spent with her. One way of doing this could be to plan in such a way that you go for that ‘boys night out’ at the same time when she goes for a trip with her girlfriends. If your work is stopping you from going home on time, make it a point to speak to your manager about it. Prioritize your relationship in such a way that your partner feels that you really value her more than anything else.
Respectfully Yours
Respect your woman and appreciate her for all that she is, rather than harping endlessly on all that she is not. Open your mind and see her in a different way. Most of all, let her know that you really value her a lot. It goes a long way in maintaining a healthy relationship. Once again, communication plays an important role here. There is no point in having feelings and not expressing them.
All Those Crushes
There will always be someone who will be the subject of your infatuation despite that fact that you are committed, or married. We guess it is natural that your eyes sometimes brighten up when there are good-looking women around you. The important thing to remember here is that it is not the feeling of infatuation that ruins a relationship, it is what a man does with this feeling that creates issues.
Let the crush remain a crush. Don’t try to be friends with her when you know your feelings for her, if nurtured, can be detrimental for your relationship. All you need to do is resist the temptation of taking it to the next level. Whenever you feel vulnerable, remember that there is a special someone who trusts you a lot and believes that you will never do any wrong. When you respect the love and feelings your partner has for you, you become self-assured and are unlikely to engage in infidelity.

Confusing Territory Alert: Infatuation Vs. Love

“Infatuation is when you think he’s as sexy as Robert Redford, as smart as Henry Kissinger, as noble as Ralph Nader, as funny as Woody Allen, and as athletic as Jimmy Conners. Love is when you realize that he’s as sexy as Woody Allen, as smart as Jimmy Connors, as funny as Ralph Nader, as athletic as Henry Kissinger and nothing like Robert Redford – but you’ll take him anyway.”
~ Judith Viorst, Redbook, 1975
So a lot of places are going to tell you that infatuation is in fact triggered by the brain due to the release of several chemicals, etc. etc. And that love is just a deep emotion, of which every individual has a different opinion and meaning. Obviously we have to take for granted that people know what they’re talking about, because we’re confused about the difference between the two. Is it love or infatuation? Well, let’s first begin with a clear understanding that love and infatuation are not opposites of each other. There’s just a very, very, painfully thin line between the two that in the end makes all the difference.

● First Signs…
You meet someone, and you are instantly attracted to them. You find it difficult to think clearly because your thoughts are plagued by their presence. They have obviously captivated you with their charm, wit, elegance, intelligence, etc. You can’t help thinking about that person whether you’re with him/her or not.
All these are characteristic to a person infatuated with another. Isn’t love supposed to be pretty much the same thing? Aren’t we conditioned to believe that the exact fluttering feeling, the lack of logical thought and sometimes silly actions are what love is all about? True, but somewhere in the midst of all this, you begin to get a nagging thought in your head which tells that this is more than just an infatuation.

● What it IS…
Infatuation begins with a physical attraction. There are a select few who go beyond outward physical appearance, and give the actual human being in that body a chance. This is not to say that you are being unfair when you get attracted to someone’s physical appearance. For some it matters, for some it doesn’t. It is completely your choice. But yes, since physical attraction plays a major role in it, how do you know if it’s love or lust? Think about it and you’ll be able to answer the question.
While many may argue that physical beauty is what attracts a person to another and that is the basis on which ‘love’ can be born, it is also true that sometimes, you really do find that you’re attracted to the person as a person and not as an object of desire. Sometimes, you really do love the person for his or her personality and when the sparks of attraction eventually begin to fly, it’s simply magical! Being attracted to someone for their person before their body is something that (while most may deny) everyone wants.

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What to Do When Selfishness Creeps into Your Relationship

“Marriage is that relation between man and woman in which the independence is equal, the dependence mutual, and the obligation reciprocal.”
― Louis K. Anspacher
Relationships are wonderful manifestation of love and care that lie in the human heart. While a relationship based on the strong foundations of love and commitment grows every day, a relationship marked by traces of selfishness and disrespect for the other partner is equally scary. While you can’t expect perfection from your partner, it is to be understood that a certain sense of belonging and care is mandatory for the relationship to thrive and blossom. Selfish behavior starts, when either of the partners is too much concerned with the physical and emotional needs of oneself, giving the least amount of focus and thought about the other partner.

The gravity of the problem intensifies, when the suffering partner is unable to figure out the cause of such an irrational behavior of the selfish partner. Any talks and arguments about the degrading relationship is refuted by the selfish partner and the relationship seems to be on the verge of extinction. No doubt selfishness in relationships leads to addictive and damaging relationships.
Typical Signs of Selfishness
A sudden and unexplained change in the behavior of the partner is the first signal to some problems. A behavioral change can be due to various factors, like stress or job pressures, but it doesn’t mean that the person is not responding to your queries and questions. The partner may stop receiving your call and may even ignore you at home by not talking to you, sleeping in another room, and even skipping dinner or lunch with you. While, it is normal in relationships to have phases of ups and downs, it is quite a serious issue if the partner is completely ignoring you, as if you are non-existent.
Fights spice up relationships and to some extent, they are necessary, but the extent of ignorance and irrational behavior by a partner is much more grievous in case of selfish partners. It can also be the other way round; the partner may become too much concerned and start expecting a lot from you. Expectations are the necessities of relationships, but the fine line dividing expectations and over-expectations is easily crossed by selfish partners.
Overcoming Selfishness
All you need to do is to consider the other person’s thoughts and feelings before you take some extreme steps. Some ways that can strengthen your relationship have been mentioned below.

▣ It’s all about Effective Communication!

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